reflections...
hasnt drop anything though i wanted to. been busy and easily tired. time seem to tick faster and faster.as usual, pain from right leg killing me again. went for polyclinic's consultation. that was my 1st visit as i never like waiting that damn long queue for that cheap consultation which my company would then recognise and reimburse my fee.
anyway, 2wks ago, spent a finally lazing saturday morning there. came up with some shit excuses which thinking doc would understand the pain i'm going thru.
yah yah.. that doc understand my backache but ended up she asked unwillingly, "so what can i do for you?"
i'm speechless of what to reply as i never expect doc would ask me that. "well, can i have an x-ray then?"
"sure. i can give u one. so, u go upstairs and come down here again later..."
yah yah... later.
"ur x-ray shows ur spine is perfectly fine. u just need to do crunches to build up ur lower back muscles and gradually would ease ur backache... blah blah..."
"but, i'm now really in pain. from my thigh to my toes. u still want me to do exercise?"
"yes, do it slowly."
=_= yah yah. shity doc.
my mood. sad? harsh? good? happy? i wonder what's wrong with the change in me? am i different now? is it for the better or for worse?
was really pissed with jasmine last nite.
if u are to view it negatively, she stood me up. she requested for a shopping spree at far east aft work on friday nite. which i badly detest going there now. bcoz i cant seem to get any clothes from there. it's a place for younger crowd, not for me anymore. also, it sure to be crowded on fri nite. anyway, she agreed going shopping with me on following day aft my facial session.
so, i ended work on my fav knock-off time - 5.30pm. reached there in super packed train and sticky sweat that stay on my arms. then, she smsed that she cropped at work. she would tried to meet me at later timing. so, i waited. shopped a.l.o.n.e. had dinner a.l.o.n.e. till i couldnt bear that backache again.
eventually, took a long bus ride to jas's vicinity and hailed a cab from there. well, this has become my easiest method to get cab outside the city.
to view the "stood me up" incident positively, she has no choice. she didnt ask for that to happen too. cant blame her unless she is the culprit of that to happen. or she actually made up an excuse to really stood me up.
anyway, i'm already out in town. i cant kept that frustration for long.
if so, how long can i keep? what will i get for keeping it in myself? what do i expect from her? jas to kneel in front of me with a cuppa tea and kowtow to me?
pointless lah...
the earth would still go round and round the orbit. time would still ticking away.
or jas, u are jus damn in luck bcoz...
#1 ~ i've finished my menses, my mood is :)
#2 ~ i heard sth negative abt me from that irritating lao shi from work. - :(
#3 ~ i did sth harsh to Nat - :(
verdict : i'm depressed? needed to be alone.
posted by jellyfishy @ 11:59 pm
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